Realizing Life

         

Chris and our dog, Faye, left yesterday afternoon. My sister and brother-in-law, the day before. Taking a headcount, only one remains—that would be me. But I’m leaving tomorrow to return to life as I know it back on the farm. Today, though, I will see to it that the place where I have been blessed to be for the last 18 days (19 counting tomorrow) is as clean as we found it when we first opened the door.

        A few times, I thought of that man in the PBS special, Alone in the Wilderness. His name was Richard Proenneke. With his own hands, he made tools, built a cabin, caught fish, grew vegetables, and hiked through the wilderness in all kinds of weather and conditions. He lived among the bears, the wolves, mountain goats, and critters too numerous to mention. I’ve wondered why he did it and wondered what he thought about while he was alone.  

        When you’re alone, your mind is free to think about anything you choose, depending on what mood you’re in. Richard Proenneke filmed his adventures with a 16mm movie camera, which is narrated to give a sense of his ongoing train of thought. But what were his off-camera thoughts? I’ve wondered that while I’ve been on this personal retreat. My guess is, though, that he had such a proactive spirit, that he spent most of his time enjoying the moment and thinking with joy of his next project rather than going into a state of deep reflection or worrying about tomorrow or reviewing his past or contemplating the state of the world.

        I thought of him, not because I, in any sense, compare my adventures in the Poconos to his in the great Northwest, but because he represents something of a spirit that in the present age in which we live is not only admirable, but is worthy of, at least to some extent, adopting. There’s so much tension, anxiety, distrust, and fear for tomorrow that the value of today and the people of our lives are lost in the wilderness of our emotions.

        In the play, Our Town, Emily is a young woman who has died, but is given the opportunity to go back and relive one of the days of her life. She chooses the day of her twelfth birthday. But when she experiences it, she is upset by the fact that everyone in her household is so busy that they pay very little attention to one another or to her presence and the celebration of her birthday. In exasperation, she cries out, “Doesn’t anyone realize their life while they live it?”

        That’s the thing I hope for all of us in the present age: To realize life while we live it—not to be swept along in the swift current that carries us past the present gift of the moment, which is the only moment we have. That’s where joy lives and beauty abounds. “May God bless us, everyone!” (Tiny Tim, A Christmas Carol)

IDEAS, REALITY, AND POSSIBILITIES

     

As my time in the Poconos continues, I have reached a conclusion that being in a different place, especially one in a natural setting, is one way to stimulate new ideas. But there is an old saying—at least I think it’s old—that goes “some things are a better idea than a reality.” I have to remind myself of all the ideas I’ve had through the years of my life that didn’t turn out to be realities because I didn’t do anything about them. Perhaps it was for the best, but I will never know for sure.

        The point is that our imaginations aren’t interested in limitations or excuses. They just come up with possibilities for improving or enhancing our lives. The inspiration they provide, however, is usually short-lived. A couple of days or a couple of weeks later, they fade into that Never-Never-Land called “What-Might-Have-Been.”

        While I’m up here, my brain has been doing some archaeological work, digging down deep into my psyche, searching for some of the old ideas I’ve had through the years, trying to see what and if any can be revived—brought back to life—made anew for the living of these days. And also, trying to give birth to fresh aspirations that might be realistic at the age of 74.

        I don’t feel particularly desperate about it, but I will say that all of us are given X-number of years to walk in this world—some longer, some shorter—and it would be a sad thing that, if when we pass from this existence to another, we look back in the rear view mirror of our lives, and slap our forehead and say, “I coulda had a V8” (if your remember that commercial.) And for whatever reason, more and more, I think about that. The trick, of course, is to be able to differentiate between pipe dreams and genuine possibilities.

        When I was a teenager, I thought about becoming a rock-and-roll star, the likes of Rick Nelson or Elvis Presley. I learned their songs among others and had a band and we played gigs at high school dances, at the Burlington County Farm Fair, and even in one of the big hotels in Atlantic City. To tell you the truth, for a while in my young mind and heart, it seemed like such a dream could actually happen. Well, obviously, it didn’t. And for a very good reason: it wasn’t meant to be. Of course, another good reason is that we simply weren’t as good as we imagined ourselves to be. i.e.-pipe dream

        On the other hand, there was no harm in that. It was part of my growing up and learning about the nature of life and, that if some dreams don’t come true, there are others just waiting to be invited into your reality, and we don’t know which ones are meant to be.  

        I suppose that my point in saying all this is that as we walk this planet, I’m thinking that we shouldn’t be afraid to allow our imaginations to give us new ideas worthy of trying. It doesn’t necessarily have to be something big and wondrous. It might be as simple as imagining ourselves to be filled with a calm, peaceful spirit or to have a new positive outlook on life or to finally achieve that place of open-mindedness that allows to grow in understanding & compassion for others or to put things behind us that don’t matter anymore or even to take up something new that we've always wanted to do. Pipe dream? Or Reality? I guess it depends, at least partially, on whether we do anything about it.

WORDS FROM THE WILDERNESS

NOT QUITE WALDEN POND

(and definitely, no Ralph Waldo Emerson)

        I am in my second week of being in the Poconos on a kind personal R&R. I’m here all during the week by myself, but joyfully, Chris comes up on the weekends, and today I am expecting company (my sister and brother-in-law). I’ll be here for most of next week, but I’m due back in the pulpit on the 24^th. I should say that I am not in the region of the Poconos, nor do I desire to be, that advertises heart-shaped tubs—a concept that I’ve never understood in that no matter what the shape, it’s still water that fills it, and in addition, is it really necessary to remind oneself that you are in love by bobbing up and down in a larger-than-life semblance of the same—if that’s your motivation?

        I’m temporarily living at a cottage on a wonderful lake—I like to think similarly to the experience of Ralph Waldo Emerson on Walden Pond, without, of course, the wisdom or literary genius of his likes. My time has really been a gift because in a matter of months, my life will change dramatically. I’ve been a church professional/minister for over 40 years. I began my career as a Director of Christian Education, aka youth pastor in Cherry Hill, NJ back in 1974. It’s been a good life for me; I’ve met some wonderful people along the way; I’ve served some great churches; and I feel like it was what I was meant to do with my life.

        I’m spending my time, if  you’re at all interested, doing some hiking, sitting by the lake, playing my guitar, writing, thinking, praying, and planning (I use the word planning loosely). Of course, there’s also the joy of going out for breakfast, lunch, or dinner, although not on the same day. I am located 5 miles above Milford, PA—a lovely town with a bit of a touristy flavor, but not overdone.

        This is the first blog entry I’ve done in quite a while, though I’ve tried many times to write in the last several months, but I was unable to come up with something worth saying. The problem has been that there are many disturbing things happening politically and otherwise in our world, that the nature of my blog did not seem relevant. You see, my style is somewhat more whimsical than pertinent, and I have realized that the more powerful voices have been the ones to pay attention to.

        However, and I do mean however, an even greater truth remains: As we observe the scenario of the world around us with its many troubling dynamics at present, how we react to them and interpret them depends on the kind of personal attention we give our spiritual selves. I’ve recently come up with a saying which I don’t know whether it’s totally mine or if I read it somewhere: “Don’t sell your soul to your problems.” I know that sounds rather trite, and yet I think that it’s so easy for us to spend a large amount of our time on this plane of existence in a state of emotional upheaval or depression or a state of being lost and confused.

        Maybe it’s because I have this time alone to think and reflect and to be apart from my usual life setting, which I dearly love, by the way, that it seems so important to me that we not lose sight of the fact that while we are all here to serve some purpose within the human family, that purpose is best served when we ourselves feel the strength, joy, and power of hope. May God grant us the awareness to see the deeper truths!

Just a final word:  “Don’t sell your soul to your problems.”